Tech Billionaire Boot Camp
  theodp writes "Forget the Summer of Code. If you've got a hot idea for a start-up, Newsweek says Y-Combinator, the boot camp where Silicon Valley meets 'American Idol', is the place you should be. 'Some critics scoff that Y Combinator's investment is peanuts for that amount of equity. But the opportunity is unparalleled -- total immersion into Silicon Valley start-up culture, advice from Graham and a fast track to the top angel investors and venture-capital funds. When Graham calls the winners, the founders have only five minutes to accept. "If people turn us down," he says, "as far as we're concerned they've failed an IQ test."'" We've previously discussed the program on the site, just over a year ago.Read more of this story at Slashdot.
http://rss.slashdot.org/~a/Slashdot/slashdot?i=CSB5x3</img>
http://rss.slashdot.org/~r/Slashdot/...t/~4/116430878

Weiterlesen...

Wirklich schöne Idee ...

Spontan:

Bob Dylan, "Highlands" ("I'm listening to Neil Young, I gotta turn up the sound / Someone is always yelling turn it down")

Kris Kristofferson, "Blame It On The Stones"
ders., "If You Don't Like Hank Williams"

Waylon Jennings, "Are You Sure Hank Done It This Way?"
ders., "Bob Wills Is Still The King"

:band:

Playliste vom 10. April 2008
  You Got The Hurt - The Branded (Single, Dirty Water, S/2008)
Love Has No Time - The Narcotics (All The Purple Pussies, Teen Sound, I/2008)
That's How Strong My Love Is - The Temponauts (A Million Year Picnic, Teen Sound, I/2008)
The Age Of Understatement - The Last Shadow Puppets (Single, Domino, UK/2008)
The Witch - Clinic (Single, Domino, UK/2008)
Turn It Down - The Draytones (Single, 1965 Records, UK/2008)
When You Fly Away - The Groovy Cellar (Single, Firestation, D/2008)
The Ballad Of Old Harold - The Poem Is You (Single, KF Records, D/2008)
Old Enough - The Raconteurs (Consolers Of The Lonely, XL Recordings, USA/2008)
Seven Stories Underground - The Gutter Twins (Saturnalia, Sub Pop, USA/2008)
Words Like Knives - I Walk The Line (Black Wave Rising!, Combat Rock, FIN/2008)
Ramona - Judge Bone (Big Bear's Gate, Bone Voyage, FIN/2008)
Smileys Are Not Enough - 22 Pistepirkko ((Well You Know) Stuff Is Like We Yeah!, Bone Voyage, FIN/2008)
Distant Dreamer - Duffy (Rockferry, Universal, UK/2008)
Stay - Marko Haavisto & Poutahaukat (The Man Without A Past (OST), Milan, FIN/2002)
Classical Gas - Mason Williams (Single, Warner Bros., USA/1968)

Nachhören wie üblich - im Zweifel PN.

RMA most games released NOW will not run at MAX detail unless on the best system out there on the market and even then....
Look at MAX PAYNE, Castle Wolfenstein, Falcon4.0 none of them would run playable at the highest details/resolution configuration.

I can turn details down and arcade mode is FINE, and I have a lesser system than yours

perhaps the odd tweak or 2 will help u or your friend, but of course those are likely too much for the developer to expect from people who spend money without at least researching what they are buying.

SKurj

Despite me putting up the most horrible questions after having the correct answer, here goes:

Just ouside Xardas tower, turn left, down. Instead of turning right then to go through the cave, walk on towards the waterfalls and underneath a tree there is one with several arrows ready to pick up.

What driver version are you using? Anything else special you've done?

I too have a system very similar to yours (3700+, 6800GT, 1024 DDR400 ram) and I average about 20 fps in medium with shadows off, and a few ini tweaks (all to turn stuff down/off). I just defragged and dusted out my case, too. :( 20 fps is playable under most circumstances, I suppose, but I prefer to have some room to breathe in for when it drops at random.

A great decision I think. You will enjoy Gothic 3 much more after having played them. At the moment I would also classify them as much, much better games overall. Smaller but much more detailed worlds that feel more alive. Better combat and story. G1 has the best atmosphere I've had in a game up to date while G2 is more polished.

Gothic 3 got better graphics (but most of us have to turn settings down from high to medium and then the game looks average) but if you crank up the resolution you can get the older games to look pretty decent as well.

spec and problems
  Abit SA6R ibm 45.g.g pIII 1.gig geforce 3 512 meg pc133 wimme
sony trinitron 17" microsoft sidewinder pro force feed back..
Can not max out grafix setting without major stutter game complely unplayable.. turn settings down but still get fps slow down makes winning impossable..I got to expert mode and ulocked the extra cars but are unuseable because and thing over 40mph and the back end spins out uncontrolably no grin on any thing but the straightest bit of track tryed to use the lower spec fwd cars but just get complely left behind and the CARS are unable to keep up with the likes off the escort rs2000 A110 ect
cars that are unlocked in the arcade mode are still not available in the other game modes so you have to start all over again.. WE WANT THE UNLOCK CODES NOW.and a patch to give the cars more grip and decent fps without slow down:mad: :mad: :mad:

Well now, lets draw 4-5x as many polygons and see what happens to framerates shall we?

You have a pretty decent system there yet you scrimped on a vid card.....
a $100 vid card on that system...
anyways obviously a new vid card would help.

I have a gf2mx i can play the game in Rally mode with a coupla details turned down, and when it comes to arcade I too see a slowdown. But hmmmmm every racing game i ever played did the same thing............. on every pc i ever owned... what a coincidence....
I turn details down, and arcade is playable I suggest you do the same.

SKurj

Sounds like your texture problem is a bit different than the one I had. My texture problem involved tiles on the floor, torches and stuff that would corrupt and create a "stalagtite" like effect where they would distort all the way vertically up to the ceiling. The odd thing is when I initially loaded the game, the textures were fine, but they would degrade after a bit of time playing. I did not have the "flashing white" textures your having. Unfortunate that it did not help in your case. What your describing sounds more like a specific driver issue for sure. Some video cards just have a hard time with certain games. example: I have a game called Pool of Radiance that displays video corruption on my machine with a Geforce 5700, but will play fine on my older machine that had a Ti-4600. The only way I was ever able to get the PoR to play without the corruption on my geforce 5700 was to turn video hardware acceleration to "standard" in dxdiag. Only problem is when I would turn acceleration down, the game became slow. I suspect that the newer pixel shader in the 6800 may be the culprit. Maybe try turning down video acceleration to test this.

If you've got a dining room, give invitiations to a meal to the people you want to make more friendly. If your party impresses your invitees (i.e. is expensive enough) your standing with them will increase a great deal - and this is passed onto your heir.

Click on the picture near the door of the dining room to decide who to invite & what to serve them. With you being sovereign I doubt many people will turn you down.

Am 30,6.2007 veranstalten Nazis in der Region Stuttgart ein
internationales Konzert im Grossraum Stuttgart. im zuge ihrer European
Revolution Tour treten neben der regional bekannten Band carpe Diem
auch die international bekannte Band Brgiada M auf. Ziel der Tour ist
es die rechtsextreme Szene zu festigen und zu vernetzen! Sascha
Deuerling, band mitglied von Carpe Diem sowie Mitorganisator des
konzerts und Gründer von RACords, wohnt in Stuttgart Bad Canstatt.
Schon im Zuge der Antifaschistischen kehrwoche-Turn it Down im März
wurde eine demonstration zu seinem Wohn und Arbeitssitz veranstalltet.
Zeigen wir ihm erneut was wir von Nazis und ihren geschäften halten.
Zeigen wir mit einer lauten Demonstration am kommenden Samstag das
Stuttgart bunt ist und nicht braun wie er und seine Kameraden es gerne
hätten.

Treffpunkt zur Antifaschistischen Demonstration ist um 16 Uhr am
Augsburger Platz in Stuttgart Bad Cannstatt.(U1,U13 halte Stelle
Augsburger Platz)

Kommt Zahlreich und mobilisiert selbst weiter!

Antifaschistische Grüsse

http://www.directupload.net/images/070629/FD8DaJ77.jpg
__________________________________________________

Kommt mal alle! :):cool:

Deviates *Full Discography*
  3 Alben

Time Is Distance
Tracklist
1. Come With Me
2. Turn It Down
3. Right Back to You
4. Twice as Nice
5. One in Ten
6. So I Become
7. Time Is the Distance
8. End
9. No Mistake
10. Disclaimer
11. Grounded
12. Start Again
13. Profile
14. My Crime

My Life
Tracklist
1.My Life
2.One Day
3.Should...
4.This Town
5.Classes
6.Midline
7.I Remember
8.Land of Opportunities
9.Who's Johnny
10.Playing to Lose
11.We Grew Up
12.Bad Seed
13.Maybe Tomorrow
14.What I've Heard
15.There for Me
16.I Hate (Teen Angst)

...und ein nicht veröffentlichtes Album

[Link nur für registrierte und freigeschaltete Mitglieder sichtbar. Jetzt registrieren...]

Und zur Propaganda in Texten: Die findet man bei einigen Bands, die heuer als NSBM gelten, nicht. Der Antifa-Onkel ist, wie er selbst gesagt hat, nach der Masche Band A spielt NSBM; Band B hat mal ne Split mit Band A gemacht und einer von denen hat ein Label, auf welchem auch rechte Bands veröffentlicht werden >> Band B ist NSBM vorgegangen, unabhängig von Textem, Artworks oder ähnlichem. Er hat ja die Sache mit Odal auch so begründet... BÖHÖHÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖSE VERSTRICKUNGEN...

Vermutlich hat er sich halt bei Turn it down etc. informiert und noch dazu die Unheiligen Allianzen gelesen..

Quote:

Originally Posted by qatzer I wouldn't stick my nose into a roleplayer's business, and I expect the same in return. I expect rp-ers to leave me alone to play how I want to play in the same way that I stay out of their rp-ing.

What I do find annoying is when rp stuff is spammed in universe or region channels. Fortunately I've only seen it in universe a couple times and I suspect it was people on noob island.

If I was into roleplaying, I'd keep it within the group of people I was roleplaying with and leave everyone else out of it because that would be the considerate thing to do imo. Unfortunately not everyone is like that - I like my music LOUD when I'm in my car, but I turn it down when I drive through a residential area, others in this world either seem to think the whole neighbourhood wants to hear their bass box booming, think people will be impressed with it, or just couldn't care less who they irritate.

Since I've been on ML no-one has tried to involve me with RPing, if that's the way it stays then I'm happy :)

heheh, try replacing "RP" with "PvP". Sooo similar :)

BUAAAAHH!!! :( HILLFEEEE!! kann mir nicht auch noch jemand helfen?? hab mich schon vor ein paar tagen gemeldet... komme auch nicht auf daves seite (furchtbar, weiblichen klischees wie diesem zu entsprechen) und möchte die sachen auch soooooooooooooooo gerne hören (hab nur lifelines und turn theclights down runterladen können von dem link unter diesem thread. bittebittebitte, laüt mich nicht dumm sterben! :D

nix geht übers Megiddo in Wien.

*sing*
In the merry month of June from me home I started,
Left the girls of Tuam so sad and broken hearted,
Saluted father dear, kissed me darling mother,
Drank a pint of beer, me grief and tears to smother,
Then off to reap the corn, leave where I was born,
Cut a stout black thorn to banish ghosts and goblins;
Bought a pair of brogues rattling o'er the bogs
And fright'ning all the dogs on the rocky road to Dublin.
One, two, three four, five, Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky
road and all the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah !

commercial suicide hat da ne ganze menge interessanter runout etchings:

SUICIDELP007:
A. We Control The Vertical
- "We're middle class and angry"
B. 174 BPM
- "Bloody Revolutions"
C. The Struggle
- "Society System Decontrol"
D. Our Leader
- "Forum Zero"
E. Property Is Theft
- "Hateful And Hollow"
F. Flight
- "Stop Looking At These Messages"
G. Freedom Come [w/ Calibre]
- "Jet Lagged Again"
H. Never Never
- "Good Night, God Bless"

SUICIDE008
A1: "SHOUTS TO THE OC CREW"
C1: "FAIRFAX SAKE" :lol:

SUICIDE009
Side AA: DUNCAN ..... TURN THAT DOWN!

SUICIDE032
A: IS IT MEH OR IS IT YOU
B: DO YOU KNOW THE WAY TO SAN JOSE .... VIA WELLY
C: SUICIDE ARMY SAYS NO
D: MUSKY LOVES BOG BRUSH

SUICIDE022:
A: "BAJAJ, LML - BIG UP THE SLOUGH SCOOTER MASSIVE"
B: "MOAN MOAN MOAN"

etc

Siongtexte, Gedichte, eigentlich fast dasselbe, oder? Deswegen stell ich jetzt mal ein zwei Sachen rein, die ich, als ich's geschrieben hab, eher als Songtext im Auge hat als als Gedicht.

I wanted you to know

Sometimes I don’t seem to know you,
Because we just started again.
And then, for a second, I feel you
And it’s incredible how much alike we are.
And we just started again.

Everything has changed once more
And there’s nothing left
And all we try, all we try
Is to get through life together.

And all I ever wanted was to fly.
All I ever wanted you to know
Is that I’ll never turn you down.

I don’t know, what life has in store for us,
There’s nothing more I need,
Than to know that you’re here.

All I ever wanted was to fly
And all I ever wanted you to know
Is that you’ll never walk alone again.

http://www.theburrow.co.uk/d85/demos/prt04.htm

Lemmo know what you think - it's supposed to run at 60fps, if you don't
manage that go into the options and turn things down.

I be pretty happy with it :D

Barry
gerbil@theburrow.co.uk

PS This is NOT a public test - I've 'borrowed' the textures from RTCW, so no
copying or referencing please!

same here

xp pro
geforce 4 Ti4200 32 bit
p3 800

"Christoffer Enedahl" <christoffer@no-enedahl-spam.com> wrote in message
news:b8ik5f$mf0$1@forums.macromedia.com...
Zitat:

Looking good. feels solid.

I had one graphical error though. a black polygon from the ceiling going
diagonally down to the floor. It was there in all viewmodes.

xp pro
geforce 2 mx/mx400 32 bit
p4 1.8ghz

/Christoffer

"Barry Swan" <gerbil@theburrow.co.uk> skrev i meddelandet
news:b8f385$2ji$1@forums.macromedia.com...
http://www.theburrow.co.uk/d85/demos/prt04.htm

Lemmo know what you think - it's supposed to run at 60fps, if you don't
manage that go into the options and turn things down.

I be pretty happy with it :D

Barry
gerbil@theburrow.co.uk

PS This is NOT a public test - I've 'borrowed' the textures from RTCW,
so
no
copying or referencing please!

Aus Gebrauchsanweisungen (in englisch)
  ich weiü ist nur kopiert, aber trotzdem witztig :)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) -
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
(Too late! You lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On a Korean kitchen knife -
WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
(Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.
(As opposed to use in outer space?)

On a Japanese food processor -
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
(Really? Peanuts contain nuts?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
(I'm glad they cleared that up.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)

On a child's superman costume - WEARING OF THIS GARMENT
DOES NOT
ENABLE YOU TO FLY.
(That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)

On some frozen dinners:
SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST.

On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:
FITS ONE HEAD.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine:
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

On Nightly sleep aid:
WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

Meine Theorie ? Piffan ist ein Flamer, das ist meine Theorie :D

Aus dem Offiziellen FAQ:

Question
_
While playing Splinter Cell, the light coming from windows seem to cover everything on the screen. The light shines through walls and can been seen through Sam's body. What is causing this problem?

Answer
_
This seems to be a problem with certain video card Antialiasing settings. This problem can occur with certain Geforce and Radeon models and can easily be resolved by disabling Antialiasing on your video card. To do this:
1. Right-click on your desktop and choose Properties.
2. Click on the Settings Tab, and then click the Advanced button in the lower left corner.
3. Click on the tab that has the name of your video card to bring up the advanced properties for that card.
3. Under the Direct3D settings, find the Antialiasing settings and set them to 'off' or turn them down all the way.
4. Click Apply and OK to save your changes.
Next time you load Splinter Cell, you should not have this problem anymore.

Heute ein Song, der mir echt aus der Seele spricht....

3 Doors Down - Duck And Run

To this world I'm unimportant just
Because I have nothing to give
So you call this your free country
Tell me why it cost so much to live
Tell me why

This world can turn me down
But I wont turn away, oh no
And I wont turn around

All my work and endless measures
Never seem to get me very far
Walk a mile just to move an inch
Now even though Im trying so
Damn hard
Im trying so hard

This world can turn me down but I
Wont turn away
And I wont duck and run, cause
Im not built that way
When everything is gone there is
Nothing there to fear
This world cannot bring me down
No cause I am already here, oh no!

Im already here, down
On my knees
Im already here, oh no,
Im already here
I must have told you a thousand
Times Im not running away

I wont duck and run
I wont duck and run
I wont duck and run
No, no, no pass away

This world can turn me down but I
Wont turn away
And I wont duck and run, cause
Im not built that way
When everything is gone there is
Nothing there to fear
This world cannot bring me down
No, cause Im already here
This world can turn me down
But I wont turn away
And I wont duck and run
Cause Im not built that way

When everything is gone there
Is nothing there to fear
This world cannot
Bring me down
No cause Im already here

Did you turn done the "Demon's" offer or accept it?

That is of course an easy thing to figure out, do you have a quest to get some mob drops or an item that you need to take to the ADC Elder...

If neither the you may need to submit a helpdesk ticket about the quest error/bug.

Odd though as when I did this one I got to the choice when talking to the "demon" on one of the towers, I turn it down and reported back to the Elder (I did check the other tower even though I know it was one or the other). I had no problems.

Zitat:

Ich und meine Mitspieler sind ja noch NOOBS bei denen das Spiel wenig von Micro abhängt und da is Stealth schlecht.Ich hatte mal Stealth und mein Gegner China Irgendwas mit GatlinKanonen.Die haben meine Hijacker immmer gesehen wenn ich was klauen oder in die Basis wollte.

darfst auch net mit nem hijacker in nen outpost laufen :) in nem rdm game ist manchmal der erste hijacker der tod des gegners.. vor allem china. flamer geklaut, 180° turn, waff down, gg... wenn der gegner weiss, dass du stealth bist, musste den schon sehr gezielt einsetzen.. auf ner grossen map: setz ihn aufn moped und schnapp dir nen dozer --> kraftwerk zu hause = alles geht schneller oder du packst ihn mit der rush-crew in nen jeep.mit denen einfach rumlatschen bringt nix, da die zu easy zu killen und obendrein zu teuer sind ( die entwicklungszeit ist ebenfalls ätzend
aber guck dir mal das replay von atomic in der replay section an, wo er stealth ist, der gegner nuke... da war der eine ( einzige) hijacker burtons tod, weil er sich den supergeilen OVERLOARD schnappte :)

The mystery of women...
  To be honest I gave up on dating, it's pointless to be honest. I don't have the time to worry about anything that falls with it, we live in a shallow time now a days. A girl or guy can have a nicest person to them but they will want someone who looks better or some other shallow reason. People lie all the time, I can't even trust girls I talk to now. I rather for a them not to lie to me when they turn me down but they do and I don't believe them when they give a reason for why they can't. Then you have people who hide their true self to satisfy the person they date. If I date a girl she will have to get over what I like cause I refuse to change who I am for anyone (people keep saying no girl likes what I'm into). And I am really sick of getting stood up on the day of the date, I give them my number to call me if they wanna back down. I don't wanna spend my day washing my hair, picking out the right outfit, and making sure everything is perfect. And when I call asking if they are ready the last thing I wanna hear is "Sorry but I can't go out with you" or "I forgot I had something to do" and not give a reason of why. I try to be a nice guy but it seems girls don't want that, personally I gave up on being a good person cause no one notices it.

Read on...
-----------------
Tags:
professionals, forum, escapistmagazine, english

jet black, katzenstreik
  unterm durchschnitt präsentiert:
16.-21.11. BLR, minsk - no culture without subculture festival
09./10.12. berlin - turn it down releaseparty (tba.)

katzenstreik
23.10. bad salzungen - time for a change fest; pressenwerk
05.11. wittenberg (bei leipzig) - musikclub bubbles (+zann + petethepilotsquid)
06.11. berlin - schokoladen (+ petethepilotsquid)
26.11. nrw/hessen/südniedersachsen .
27.11. köln - tba.
18.12. neumünster - az

jet*black
25.09. berlin | mehringhof (+turbostaat)
16.10. bonn - kult 41, food not bombs soli-konzert (+karlsson)
26.11. münster - baracke (+mallorys last dance) tbc.
27.11. saarburg bei trier - schlachtpinte (+ mallorys last dance)

infos + platten unter www.unterm-durchschnitt.de und www.grrr.de.vu

interiour decorator
  hallo,

also, ich hab mir grad so ein teil gekauft..wollte etwas richtig grade stellen. nun hab ich aber das falsche ausgewählt. wie wähich da aus, wie ich was haben will?
ich meine turn, up, down. wie komm ich wieder zu diesem menü?

oder geht das garned mehr?

wenn nicht, ists ja ganz schön teuer . 10k kostet das mittlereile :(

war glaub mal billiger.

Liste der Anhänge anzeigen (Anzahl: 1) @all: Jedem das seine... Das mit der Verwarnung bei Metallhuhn kann ja wohl nicht wahr sein. Könnten die Admins das nicht wieder entfernen? (es heiüt ja diy-community, was eigentlich ALLES beinhaltet, was selbstgemacht ist)

Ich möchte jetzt nicht einen neuen Thread anfangen wegen "Schaut mal was für ein tolles Display ich gefunden hab, kann man das nehmen???" *g*

also hier isses

kann man das den nehmen :) :)
besondere Aufmerksamkeit sollte man auf den 16:9 -> 4:3 switch legen

Model Number. SV18-65NP
Key Specifications/Special Features:
Screen size: 6.5 inches (diagonal)
Ratio: 16:9 wide TFT screen
Optional 4 display modes: 4:3<-->16:9 <-->16:9 Zoom<-->4:3 For CCTV
Resolution (H x V): 1440 x 234 = 336,960 pixels
Color configuration: RGB stripe
Video system: PAL/NTSC/SECAM auto conversion
2 Video inputs plus 1 Audio input
IR remote control
Full function OSD control (Multi-language)
Audio output: Speaker built-in & earphone jack
Video input signal: 1.0Vp-p, composite video
Reversible screen: X-turn (mirror picture) & Y-turn (flip-down picture) available

High resolution and no radiation (better for eyes’ protection)
DVD/VCD/Security system/Navigation system compatible
(Rear view camera connectible)
Mount type: Sunvisor Mount
Power input: DC 12V
Power consumption: 9.5W
Dimension: 36015021(mm)(W x D x H)
Packing Details: 10pcs/ctn of 46.5x43x33cm
Delivery Time: 25 days
Payment Terms: T/T or L/C at sight
Safety/Quality Approvals:

Für mich kommt eigentlich auch nur E Gitarren Musik in Frage.

Und Turn up the radio von Autograph ist mein Lied. hehe

".... Day in day out all week long
Things go better with rock
The only time I turn it down
Is when I'm sleepin it off....

Turn up the radio
I need the music, gimmie some more
Turn up the radio
I wanna feel it got to gimmie some more

...I feel the beat, I'm in a trance
No better place to be
Daytime nightime, anytime
Things go better with rock
I'm goin' twenty four hours a day
I can't seem to stop..."

Superman

Superman's had a hard week of fighting crime in Metropolis and is
ready for some fun. So Friday afternoon, he looks up his pals Batman
and Spiderman to see if they're up for going on the prowl that
evening. Both turn him down on account of prior commitments, and
Superman is pretty ticked. As he's flying around the stratosphere
letting off steam, he spots Wonder Woman lying on her back stark naked
sunbathing on the beach.
"Hey," he thinks, "I'm Superman and I don't need those two clowns to
have a good time. I can just fly down there at the speed of light,
catch a quickie, and fly away before she knows what happened."
So, Superman zips down, takes advantage of the situation and flies
away at the speed of light.
Wonder Woman says, "What the hell was that?"
The Invisible Man says, "I don't know but it hurt like hell."

Arctic Monkeys - When the Sun goes down

I said, who's that girl there?
I wonder what went wrong
So that she had to roam the streets
She doesn't do major credit cards
I doubt she does receipts
It's all not quite legitimate

And what a scummy man
Just give him half a chance
I bet he'll rob you if he can
Can see it in his eyes, yeah
That he's got a driving ban
Amongst some other offences

And i've seen him with girls of the night
And he told Roxanne to put on her red light
They're all infected but he'll be alright
Cause he's a scumbag, don't you know
I said he's a scumbag, don't you know

Although you're trying not to listen
Avert your eyes and staring at the ground
She makes a subtle proposition
I'm sorry love, i'll have to turn you down

And oh, he must be up to something
What are the chances? Sure it's more than likely
I've got a feeling in my stomach
You start to wonder what his story might be
What his story might be, yeah

They said he changes when the sun goes down
Yeah, they said he changes when the sun goes down
And they said he changes when the sun goes down around here
Around here

Look, here comes a Ford Mondeo
Isn't he Mr. Inconspicuous
And he ain't even have to say owt
She's in the stance ready to get picked up

Bet she's delighted when she sees him
Pulling in and giving her the eye
Because she must be fucking freezing
Scantily clad beneath the clear night sky
It doesn't stop in the winter, no

And they said he changes when the sun goes down
Yeah, they said he changes when the sun goes down
And they said he changes when the sun goes down
Around here

Well they said he changes when the sun goes down
Over the river,going out of town
They said he changes when the sun goes down
Around here
Around here

And what a scummy man
Just give him half a chance
I bet he'll rob you if he can
Can see it in his eyes, yeah
That he's got a nasty plan
I hope your not involved at all

Mai 2008

http://img228.imageshack.us/img228/6421/xls329et8.jpg

20 mal
Cajun Dance Party - The Race

14 mal
The Silver Tree Club - Shakin'

11 mal
Hudson Mohawke - Ooops!

10 mal
Portishead - Third

9 mal
Pete Molinari - Sweet Louise EP
Vincent Vincent And The Villains - Pretty Girl

7 mal
The School - All I Wanna Do
White Hinterland - Phylactery Factory
Souther Still / Yardghost - Sump Of Love / Sweethearts Of The Zodiac

6 mal
The New Sins - It Doesn't Work Like That
The See See - Up The Hill
Those Dancing Days - Hitten
Hush The Many (Heed The Few) - Revolve

5 mal
Neil Young - Zuma
The Moderates - Fetishes
Sarabeth Tucek - Sarabeth Tucek
Taken By Trees - Sweet Child O' Mine
The Explorers Club - Do You Love Me?
John & Jehn - My Friends
Mr David Viner - Go Home
The Felice Brothers - The Felice Brothers

4 mal
Alela Diane - Songs Whistled Through White Teeth
A Weather - The Feather Test
The Octopus Project - Wet Gold
The Sonic Hearts - To Be Someone
Goldfrapp - A&E
One More Grain - Having A Ball
The Draytones - Turn It Down
The Ting Tings - Great DJ
Wilson Tan - Big Dog

3 mal
The Cavaliers - You're Not The Same Girl
Tindersticks - The Hungry Saw
The Shortwave Set - No Social
Guessmen - Black Balloons
The Last Shadow Puppets - The Age Of Understatement
The Lodger - The Good Old Days
Jeremy Jay - We Were There
One Night Only - It's About Time
The Duke Spirit - The Step And The Walk
Effi Briest - Longshadow
School Of Seven Bells - Silent Grips
Elvis Costello - Momofuku

2 mal
Felt - Me And A Monkey On The Moon
Alela Diane - The Pirate's Gospel
Holly Golightly & The Brokeoffs - You Can't Buy A Gun When You're Crying
Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago
Eleni Mandell - Miracle Of Five
Adrian Orange & Her Band - Adrian Orange & Her Band
Coley Park - Quiet Lanes And Other Stories
Goldfrapp - Happiness
Hatcham Social - So So Happy Making
Television Personalities - The Good Anarchist
Sarabeth Tucek - Something For You
NiTasha Jackson - First Love
Chairlift - Evident Utensil
Kings Have Long Arms - Big Umbrella
Naomi Shelton And The Gospel Queens - What Have You Done?
The Raveonettes - You Want The Candy
Portishead - Machine Gun

August 2008

http://img147.imageshack.us/img147/8146/o1695857pu0.jpg

9 mal
Cajun Dance Party - Colourful Life

7 mal
The See See - Up The Hill

6 mal
Cajun Dance Party - The Race

5 mal
The Ruling Class - Flowers
Fleet Foxes - White Winter Hymnal

4 mal
Johnny Flynn And The Sussex Wit - A Larum
Micachu - Lone Ranger
Pete Greenwood - Penny Dreadful
Those Dancing Days - Hitten
Congregation - Feel Like Crying

3 mal
Graham Day & The Gaolers - Travelled & Unravelled
Travis - J. Smith
Souther Still / Yardghost - Sump Of Love / Sweethearts Of The Zodiac
The Silver Tree Club - Shakin'
Gravenhurst - Nightwatchman's Blues
Effi Briest - Longshadow
The Courteeners - No You Didn't, No You Don't
The Cavaliers - You're Not The Same Girl
Barringtone - Snake In The Grass
Mumford & Sons - Lend Me Your Eyes
Kitty Daisy & Lewis - Going Up The Country
Duffy - Warwick Avenue
The Troubadours - (I'm Not) Superstitious
Mr David Viner - Go Home

2 mal
The Chi-Lites - Have You Seen Her
Neil Young - Zuma
The Smiths - Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
The Arlenes - Stuck On Love
Ephemera - Happy, Grateful, Aware
22-20s - Shoot Your Gun
Seventeen Evergreen - Haven't Been Yourself
Seventeen Evergreen - Life Embarrasses Me On Planet Earth
David Cronenberg's Wife - My Best Friend's Going Out With A Girl I Like
Mystery Jets - Young Love
Joanne Robertson - The Lighter
Dawn Kinnard - Devil's Flame
School Of Seven Bells - Silent Grips
Vincent Vincent And The Villains - Pretty Girl
Ghostwood - Red Version
Cats In Paris - Foxes
Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance With You
Johnny Flynn And The Sussex Wit - Leftovers
Micah P. Hinson And The Red Empire Orchestra - When We Embraced
Goldfrapp - A&E
Liz Green - Midnight Blues
Johnny Flynn And The Sussex Wit - Tickle Me Pink
Leona Naess - Heavy Like Sunday
Younghusband - The Judas Cow
Casiotone For The Painfully Alone - Town Topic EP
The Octopus Project - Wet Gold
The Duke Spirit - My Sunken Treasure
Sixtoes - Four Leaved Clover
Hudson Mohawke - Ooops!
Kings Have Long Arms - Big Umbrella
John & Jehn - Fear Fear Fear
Television Personalities - The Good Anarchist
The Draytones - Turn It Down
The Duke Spirit - The Step And The Walk
TeenagersInTokyo - Very Vampyr
Florence And The Machine - Kiss With A Fist

kann dir necrovally, mirror wall, sangan, last turn, cost down biten!

I have also same wheel, I use sensitivity put to 50% and deadzone to 50%-60%. With lots of deadzone you can turn wheel more agressively. Don't turn sensitivity down too much, otherwise force-feedback effects are dampening.

ARCADE MODE, GPL, Nascar 4....
  Ok seeing alot of complaints about framerate drop in arcade mode.....

Rally Trophy is a game based on Rally racing, where 99% of the time, you cannot see another car besides your own at any time through the stage.

Which leads me to believe a game designed to imitate rally driving would be optimized for the single car on the track/stage scenario. This would permit great detail in tracks and cars and special effects woohoo!! the ultimate IMO.

BUT, as most rally sims have done in the past, an arcade mode has to be added to the game......(i would be more than happy without an arcade mode but hey...)

SO when adding an arcade mode, what does a developer do? Sacrifice details in all modes so that arcade mode is playable? Optimize the game for Arcade mode, effectively destroying the amount of detail possible in rally mode.
Or better yet build a separate module all its own for arcade with new lower detail models, and terrain, permitting rally mode to be left alone.....
Hmmmmm
Yeah the last option seems the best doesn't it..... guess what? Do ya think that could have been done with BB's budget? I doubt it very much, more than likely the budget would have to be increased by 50% or more... (i hear someone laughing...)

Nascar 4, GPL, I can race around in those games with everything maxed! to the limit ... when there is NO AI on the track or in the pits. When GPL was released I had to turn details down sooo far with the introduction of AI it wasn't funny, and it was barely playable too...
Lets leave gfx at max in N4 and add the AI... wow with 43 cars in front and all details maxed its a slideshow...
Sure these games can draw more cars ahead than RT, but they were DESIGNED to. If they had only to account for 5 cars ever on the track, don't you think the level of detail possible would be much greater?
GPL, and Nascar4 are optimized for the multiple cars in view scenario. The fact that when you take the multiple cars away the FPS goes up goes without saying.
Rally driving is the opposite, I hope yas can understand that and realize that frame rates dropping by a large amount only makes sense!!!
Yes probably BB will try and improve things abit, but there is a good chance that in doing so, that something will have to be sacrificed in one form or another.

Don't understand Arcade mode at all... I don't think any of the first 6 tracks require brakes or even a downshift....

SKurj

It works o.k. now....just irritating when a person is suppose to have a great vid card to get stunning graphics and to actually have to turn them down to play... :(

I will try, the only reason I would turn you down if I was in Germany cheering and singing :D

Sweet - Greatest Hits



Beobachten kann man den Werdegang einer Band vom simplen Bubblegum ("Funny Funny"; "CoCo"; "Poppa Joe") der Songwriter Nicky Chinn und Mike Chapman, im business damals "Chinnichap" genannt, über einen härteren Stil, der immer noch von letzteren geprägt war ("Ballroom Blitz"; "Turn it down"), bis zur völligen Emanzipation der Sweet ("Fox on the run"), als sie ihre songs selber zu schreiben begannen und damit ebenso erfolgreich blieben.

Die Musik wurde dadurch nicht schlechter, und so muü man sich der Erkenntnis stellen, daü The Sweet mehr waren als nur eine Retortenband. Die songs wurden mit der Zeit immer filigraner, besser instrumentiert und abgemischt - eine Entwicklung, die damit begonnen hatte, daü die B-Seiten der Singles schon in der frühen Phase von Connolly-Priest-Scott-Tucker waren und offensichtlich Talent erkennen lieüen. Diese Entwicklung fand mit dem Album "Desolation Boulevard" mit dem überraschenden Remake von "The Man With the Golden Arm" ihren Höhepunkt. The Sweet hörten damit auf, nur eine Single-Band zu sein.

In der Tat waren The Sweet ein seltener Hybrid zwischen einer Retortenband und einer Hardrock-Band, deren Mitglieder sich schon kannten und als Band formiert hatten, bevor sich Chinnichap ihrer annahmen. Diesem Umstand ist es vielleicht auch zu verdanken, daü The Sweet bis heute leider nur einen bescheidenen Platz in der Historie der Rockmusik einnehmen. Das ist aber immerhin noch um Klassen besser, verglichen mit ihren damaligen Konkurrenten um die Mädchenherzen, den Bay City Rollers.

Trackliste
01 Block Buster
02 Hell Raiser
03 Ballroom Blitz
04 Teenage Rampage
05 Little Willy
06 Wig Wam Bam
07 Action
08 New York Connection
09 The Lies In Your Eyes
10 Reflections
11 Turn it Down
12 Done Me Wrong All Right
13 Co-Co
14 Funny Funny
15 Poppa Joe
16 Alexander Graham Bell
17 Peppermint Twist
18 Rock & Roll Disgrace
19 The Six Teens
20 Fox On The Run <table cellpadding="3" cellspacing="0" border="0" width="2" height="5"> <tbody><tr valign="top"> <td width="50%">
</td> </tr> </tbody> </table>[Link nur für registrierte und freigeschaltete Mitglieder sichtbar. Jetzt registrieren...] 25 volle Qellen

Wer mehr von Sweet hören möchte:

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viel Spass beim saugen

mfg

der kuhlste:

Arctic Monkeys - When the sun goes down (eine Kritik an der Prostitution)

Who's that girl there?
I wonder what went wrong
So that she had to roam the streets
She dunt do major credit cards
I doubt she does receipts
It's all not quite legitimate

And what a scummy man
Just give him half a chance
I bet he'll rob you if he can
Can see it in his eyes,
Yeah, that he's got a driving ban
Amongst some other offences

And I've seen him with girls of the night
And he told Roxanne to put on her red light
They're all infected but he'll be alright
Cause he's a scumbag, don't you know
I said he's a scumbag, don't you know!

Although you're trying not to listen
Overt your eyes and staring at the ground
She makes a subtle proposition
"I'm sorry love I'll have to turn you down"

He must be up to something
What are the chances sure it's more than likely
I've got a feeling in my stomach
I start to wonder what his story might be

They said it changes when the sun goes down
Around here

Look here comes a Ford Mondeo
Isn't he Mister Inconspicuous?
And he don't even have to say 'owt
She's in the stance ready to get picked up

Bet she's delighted when she sees him
Pulling in and giving her the eye
Because she must be fucking freezing
Scantily clad beneath the clear night sky
it doesn't stop in the winter, no
Around here

They said it changes when the sun goes down
Over the river going out of town

What a scummy man
Just give him half a chance
I bet he'll rob you if he can
Can see it in his eyes that he's got a nasty plan
I hope you're not involved at all

der bescheuertste und einfach nur sinnlos doof:

White Stripes - Jimmy the exploder (trotzdem geiles Lied^^)

Now Jimmy
Well, do you want an explosion now?

Yeah Jimmy
Do you want to explode now?

Yeah monkey
Now you seeing red now
Yeah monkey
Jumping on the bed now

Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

Green apples
On the tree and growing now
Green apples
Are gonna be exploding now

Yeah monkey
Are you seeing red now?
Yeah monkey
Jumping on the bed now

Woo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

I too have a Radeon 9700PRO, and Ryzom is near unplayable if I enter a city. I guess I have to turn everything down to minimum just to get a decent framerate.

Sorry für den Doppelpost aber ich beziehe mich nun auf die frage für das dosbox programm. hier eine anleitung wie man das programm bedient.

hoffe du kommst mit den englisch klar.

DOSBox 0.72 Crusader Guide

Welcome to the DOSBox 0.72 Crusader Guide. In this thread, I will list the steps on how to properly use DOSBox (http://www.dosbox.com/) to run both Crusader games at the optimal level.

Once downloaded, install it. If you get confused any time, just refer to the readme the installation provides.

Put in your No Remorse/No Regret CD.
Open DOS Box.
Type the following command (no quotations) “mount [driveletter] [driveletter]: -t cdrom”.
Type (no quotations) "[CDROMDRIVE]:"
Type “install” to install the game.
Follow the instructions.
Type the following command (no quotations) “mount c C:[YOURCRUSADERDIRECTORY]”.
Type the following command (no quotations) "C:".
Type the following without quotations "Crusader"or "Regret" to run the game.

Here is an example:
Mount d D: -t cdrom
D:
Install
Mount c C:Crusader
C:
Crusader

If your game is slow, you should turn up/down the cycling (Turn up – CTRL-F12, Turn Down – CTRL-F11).

There's no need to do this every time to run Crusader. D-Fend is a DOSBox frontend, allowing you to make icons on the desktop, so you can just click it to start the game with your defined settings!

Note: You may need to create a folder prior to installation, or it may come up with an error message saying there's not enough hard drive space.

und das problem mit dem pier. vielleicht musst du wirklich nochmal ab einem gewissen punkt anfangen.... hier kannst du dir das mal ansehen so als komplettlösung
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFPFF...e=channel_page

maybe you neeeeeeed somebody just llike meeeeeeee
don´t turn me down cause i´ve got no car ive got no money........

oh man mir ist so langweilig. dumdidudm

Danny was home the next day, and it was just the three of us and Liam for two weeks. It was boring. The same thing every day. Wake up, feed Liam, feed ourselves, nap, feed Liam, nap, feed Liam, nap, feed Liam, then bedtime. Not much difference really.

I was awoken from my own nap by Dougie blasting out New Found Glory in the room next to mine. Thoroughly pissed off at being awoken, I stormed to his room.

“Dougie, will you please turn that down?" I said, popping my head around Dougie’s bedroom door. I laughed to myself – Dougie was air guitaring and hadn’t noticed me yet. Thinking that I needed I good laugh, I walked into the room, arms folded and watched. Dougie was still oblivious. He was jumping all over the floor, on the bed, spinning around, kneeling on the floor.

It was only when I became hysterical that Dougie noticed me. He turned a burning red. He stuttered his words before falling silent with deadly embarrassment.

“D…don’t you knock?!" Dougie asked, now turning the music off.

“I did knock. I came to ask you to turn it down – some of us need sleep you know." I said matter of factly.

“I…sorry…next time don’t come in till I say, ok?" Dougie requested.

“Sure, dude." I said, still laughing. I walked out of the room, now with no intention of going back to sleep. Four in the afternoon – you’d think I’d be able to catch a few z’s. But no. Dougie with his music. Or Tom with his guitar. Or Danny’s laughter. I never got peace in that house.

“Thought you were sleeping?" Danny asked me when I entered the living room. Liam was sitting on Danny’s lap, watching cartoons. Danny seemed more fascinated than the toddler did.

“Dougie." I said simply. I didn’t intend to tell Danny about what I’d found Dougie doing. He deserved some respect. I crashed onto one of the sofas, watching the TV lazily. The only movement I made for the next few hours was to scratch myself and yawn.

This was the life.

Dougie still seemed off. He was shutting him self away a lot more now. He only came down from his room for meals. Then he would return straight after. I was worried. It had happened gradually, but I noticed. That’s what best friends do. We notice when things aren't right. And ever since Tom’s illness, we all became more aware of each others doings.

For a fleeting moment I thought Dougie might have been bulimic too. But every time I went up to his room after he disappeared, I found him fast asleep in bed.

What had happened to him? It must have been serious. Broken up with a girlfriend? Trouble with his mum? I couldn’t ask him. That was just nosy.

Tonebender tone & transistor mods
  Hello,
I was searching for some bender tone thread but nothing seemed to satisfy so I got to work,....(thereby burning my fingers..)

After some research,..

I did some tone mods on the bender fuzz:

The tone regulation exists of two parallel hi-pass filters linked by P2,
R9 and C7 together have a lower cut-off frequency than C6 and R10.
Turning p2 towards R9 and C7 gets you more low frequencies, by turning towards R10 and C6 less. The tone knob (P2) regulates the quantity of low frequencies, all higher frequencies pass.

I tempered some of the highest frequencies by installing a simple low-pass filter by linking a 22nF cap with an spdt switch between the output (middle contact) of P2 and Gnd. This goes better with my fender princeton65, this amp has lots (read: too much) treble (read: trouble ), Hints on solving this are welcome!

I also adapted the range of P2. For more bass (you get more bass by reducing the lowest cutoff-frequency, i.e. raise the value of C7 ) and bass regulation, raise C6 and C7 , for more treble regulation, reduce C7 and C6 in value.
Obviously I Raised the value of C6 and C7.

A last thing I did was replacing R6 (10k) with a 20k or 25k pot to adjust bias, for milder germanium fuzzy overdrive use a log pot and turn it down,....:)!!!
The bad thing is you lose volume, this can be adjusted by the volumeswitch orrr,.. If you really like the milder sound you can set the log pot to a desired point and raise the volumeknob-territory to a higher level by lowering the value of R8. I replaced it with 10k for starters.

Did someone experiment with the Hfe values of T1,2 and 3?. How does the Hfe values effect the tone? ( mine; t1:82, t2:72,t3:250 ).
I really like the bite of this pedal but sometimes I mis some smoothness, some "hair".
What are the "best" type of caps?

All comments and other mods are welcome, I 'm learning every day :)

How did I ever let you slip away
Never knowing I'd be singing this song someday
And now I'm sinking, sinking to rise no more
Ever since you closed the door

(Chorus)
If I could turn, turn back the hands of time
Then my darlin' you'd still be mine
If I could turn, turn back the hands of time
Then my darlin' you'd still be mine

Funny,funny how time goes by
And blessings are missed in the wink of an eye
Why oh why oh why should one have to go on suffering
When every day I plead please come back to me

(Chorus)

(Bridge)
And you had enough love for the both of us
But I, I did you wrong I admit I did
But now I'm facing the rest of my life alone

(Chorus)

I'd never hurt you (If I could turn back)
Never do you wrong (If I could turn back)
And never leave your side (If I could turn back)
If I could turn back the hands

There'll be nothing I wouldn't do for you (If I could turn back)
Forever honest and true to you (If I could turn back)
If you accept me back in your heart, I love you
If I could turn back the hands

(If I could turn back) That would be my will
(If I could turn back) Darlin' I'm begging you to take me by the hands
If I could turn back the hands

I'm going down yes I am (If I could turn back)
Down on my bended knee yeah (If I could turn back)
And I'm gonna be right there until you return to me
If I could turn back the hands

(If I could turn back) If I could just turn back that little clock on the wall
(If I could turn back) Then I'd come to realize how much I love you, love you, love you, love you, love you
If I could turn back the hands

Ja, sorry, es handelt sich um Goldberg:

Zitat:

Formula

Layers:
Body Hair: Torso 5/6, X 85, Y 0, S -25, A 25
Knee Pads: 5/16, X -13, Y -100, S -85, A
100
Wrestling Tights: 17/18 middle, 1st Colour, X 100, Y -100, S 40
2nd colour, X 100, Y -100, S 80
Underwear: 3/23 smallest, X -13, Y -100, S -50
Top Lip Design: 93/149, Make it small enough that it makes the bottom of the heart shape replicate the indentation on top lip, X -100, Y -70, S 70, A 40
Facial Hair Layering:
Template 13/27, 86, 0, 5, 85
Template 12/27, 86, 0, 10, 100
Design 135/149, 2nd Smallest in height, smallest in width, place on his right side of chin just off the middle, 100, -100, 78, 26
(Do the same again, but place on the opposite side).
Moustache 1/13, 86, 0, 30, 70
Goatee 4/14, 86, 0, -10, 100
Design 138/149: 2nd Smallest in height, Largest in width. Turn upside down and place immediately below the bottom lip in the middle. 80, -100, 90, 0
Goatee 1/14, 86, 0, 10, 60
Goatee 11/14, 85, 0, 15, 100

Elbows 3/10, Smallest cut-out, -13, -100, -80, 100
Boots/Shoes 2/37, Smallest, -13, -100, -85
Hands: 7/16, Biggest pair, X -13, Y -100, S -80
Make up, 1/29, smallest, 87, 0, 0, 50
Design 109/149, Circle, make into an oval and place so that only the bottom of the oval is seen under the eye. This is the bags under his eyes. -85, -30, -30, 10
(Do the same again for the other eye).
Design (Body tattoo - Back), 33/149, smallest height, largest width, -18, -100, 100, 100.
Body Tattoo: Design 33/149, 2nd Smallest V, Largest H, place over shoulder (above bicep left arm). X -18, Y, -100, S -35, A 81
(Do the same again, but place so that it makes the first tattoo thicker).

Up to you how you register him. I prefer: Brand: RAW, name: Goldberg, Nickname: The Man, The Man, Weight: 128kg, From: Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Die Markierten sind so meine Probleme..

Intelligenz... oder nicht Intelligenz?
  Bin gerade drüber gestolpert, ich hoffe es stört nicht allzuviele, dass es auf Englisch ist^^
------------------------------------------------------------------
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)